Gregory's Server
Twitter Executives: We need you to hire back all the people you spontaneously fired.
Elon Musk: Okay, I will change Twitter's name to X.
Twitter Executives: Why?
Elon Musk: So we can tell all our ex-employees that they are actually X employees.
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39 posts total
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 I bet my girlfriend that this picture of our cats could get 10 billion boosts on Mastodon. She said she doesn't believe me. She said there's only 13 million accounts on Mastodon. She said there aren't even 10 billion people on Earth. She said it concerns her that I struggle so hard to comprehend large numbers. Let's prove her wrong everyone. Boost away and show her just how awesome the Mastodon community is.
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@lowqualityfacts@mstdn.social what about non-Mastodon social networks in Fediverse? Btw I use Misskey How to use Mastodon: Step 1: Sign up. Step 2: Do regular social media stuff. Journalists: Only those with advanced degrees in computer science should even attempt to navigate Mastodon, the frustrations of its complexities will drive the average user to a state of hysteria.
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@lowqualityfacts @lowqualityfacts I saw someone argue that shitposters can't succeed on Mastodon because their posts won't go viral due to the lack of an algorithm. As a counterpoint to their belief I would like to introduce exhibit A, whatever the hell this account is.
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 @lowqualityfacts It's really funny how they use the phrase "town square"to mean " billions of people" @lowqualityfacts Wait, so they think “virality” can only be achieved artificially? That seems counter to the very definition.  @lowqualityfacts You are clearly a genius salesman, and I now need you to market my new brand of Flux Capacitor. Don't suppose you might know anyone who owns a DeLorean? Threads, Twitter, and Bluesky: Our billionaire is better than your billionaire. Mastodon: You actually don't need a billionaire at all. Threads, Twitter, and Bluesky: Hold on, we have to ask our billionaire if that's true.
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@lowqualityfacts i been trying to tell people how mastodon exists as an alternative but i guess nobody will give a damn until it is popular 🤷🏻♂️  @lowqualityfacts the national news here yesterday decided to do a few puff pieces on zuck, threads and meta. I wish that (boot licking) at least funded good journalism and reporting, but the last several years don't point to that. Some people have seemed confused about what my Low Quality Facts account is, so I made this graph to help you all understand it.
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I got Fishy a new scratchy ramp. I think he's imagining that it's a roller coaster here.
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It is insane how much better engagement is on Mastodon than on Twitter. On here, I've gained over 100 followers from a single post a few times already. On Twitter, my most popular tweet ever got 2 million impressions. And the analytics claim that earned me...... a whopping 2 new followers.
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 They did win I tell ya! If you look at everything except money, politics, too big to fail corps, laws, racism, misogyny, etc  Mastodon now has over 10 million users! That is twice as many people as the population of Japan if only 5 million people lived in Japan. Incredible.
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@lowqualityfacts this is a low quality fact, but it's typed like a high quality fact instead of scribbled like a low quality fact, but it is technically correct (the best kind of correct) so it is technically a high quality fact, making my process of determining the difference between high and low quality facts still correct
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@lowqualityfacts This could well be the lowest quality I've seen so far. Well done.
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@lowqualityfacts i think we should collectively change that to "dog announcement" "The fediverse isn't profitable" Actually, the fediverse is a great place for artists and creators to find support for work they are passionate about and pour their soul into. It's just not profitable for multi-million dollar corporations that want to fill the pockets of already far too wealthy execs.
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@lowqualityfacts but I don't care for profit, I care have a way to connect to people. By the way, remember that I need to see if the person who care the server accept donations to maintain the instance I am registry.  @lowqualityfacts I’m so tired of “enriches the 1%” as the only metric that seems to matter… @lowqualityfacts i feel like it just needs a feed based on likes. For now they don't do anything but I'd love to see my following/instance's most liked tweets in the last 24h. That would help small creators be pushed forward. Same with boosts! I wanted to see if ChatGPT could put me out of the job, so I asked it to write a funny fake fact. To my surprise, it literally just plagiarized one of my own facts. Nearly word for word. I'd say my position remains safe for now.
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@lowqualityfacts @lowqualityfacts But bananas are actually berries and strawberries are not. That's a TF not a LQF 😆
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@lowqualityfacts Wait, the raging furry astrophysicist is on Mastodon? I've heard about them from The Click! Link please!  Feeling inadequate because everyone on Mastodon appears to be a professor or a doctor or a rocket scientist? Follow me and feel better about yourself, for I have the intellect of a clever potato.
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@lowqualityfacts I'm none of those things. Neither are most of the people I'm following on Mastodon. You must have a uniquely elite list you follow!  @lowqualityfacts I actually feel inadequate because I look like a mildly intelligent potato. 😩 My goal isn't for Mastodon to replace Twitter. My goal is for the Fediverse to attack and dethrone God.
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Sent an email with a typo in it shortly before they moved the doomsday clock forward, and I can't help but feel at least partially responsible.
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@lowqualityfacts if it's not something to do with Optimus Prime's little brother knocking up an earth chick, I have no interest  @lowqualityfacts And in the sixth month the rig Gabriel was sent from God unto a city of Galilee, named Nazareth… 12
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@lowqualityfacts Je je je
@lowqualityfacts Jokes on Elon, all of those employees have rightfully kissed his ass goodbye.
@lowqualityfacts Twitter X-ecutives: "..."