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mekka okereke :verified:

The woman in front of me, turned around and shouted "Both of you shut up!"

Everyone was of course shocked.

I said, "Umm.. no, I'm not going to 'shut up.' I'm going to take my place in line. This doesn't even concern you. Why are you involved?"

At this point she said, "You're threatening me! I feel intimidated!"

*Audible gasps from white crowd*

*cringe wince from front desk staff*

A few guests said, "Is she serious right now?"

She leans in to front desk staff and calls security on
me.

66 comments
Matthew Broberg

@mekkaokereke good god, I’m so glad I know the ending already bc this is cringy

Matthew Broberg

@willaful absolutely scary—I could have been more thoughtful with my words there. I’m thankful you’re okay @mekkaokereke

mekka okereke :verified:

Security shows up, and she says that I'm intimidating her, standing too close to her, shouting at her, etc.

Security listened patiently to her story, and the other guests told what really happened.♥️

Security says, "Ma'am. We have security cameras and I saw everything that happened. What you said is not accurate. And...you initiated verbal contact with him? I'm not kicking him out, I'm not kicking you out, and I'm not kicking the other guest out. Is there anything else I can help you with?"

John Cutting

@mekkaokereke
I've always suspected that these Karens fantasize about calling security/police on [insert minorities of choice] the same way that gun nuts fantasize about murdering a "bad guy with a gun." Your Karen was just jonesing to butt in and escalate.

mekka okereke :verified:

Sometimes people really are intimidated by me. I'm a big dude! Trust me when I tell you that those folk act *very* differently.

This woman was not intimidated.

She wanted to use situational power to tell me to shut up, and the threat of force to get me kicked out of the hotel or subjected to physical violence.

She was genuinely surprised that most of the white folk that saw this interaction were appaled and disgusted by her actions. She was confused that she couldn't weaponize hotel security.

Edge

@mekkaokereke

This is sickening. Grateful it went the way it did.

Kevin Stewart

@mekkaokereke Grateful that things turned out the way they did.

Saddened but not surprised that it happened in the first place.

Boo Ramsey 🧛🏻‍♂️🧟‍♂️👻🎃

@mekkaokereke I guess a good thing about the Karen meme is it helps us recognize what’s happening when it happens.

Bruce Elrick

@ramsey @mekkaokereke

It's almost analogous to the fediverse situation that Mekka described where a large fraction of oblivious white people stay oblivious until the gross racism is finally documented so well it cannot be denied.

Once their mind accepts the reality, they all-of-a-sudden can see subtle examples that their minds used to filter out.

They become woke.

Woozle Hypertwin

@mekkaokereke The woke mind virus has taken away her freedom 🇺🇸 🎆 to weaponize racism! Help help, she's being repressed! Won't somebody think of the privilege?? (etc.)

This performance clearly qualifies for the Facepalme d'Or. 🏆

Woozle Hypertwin

@adrienne @mekkaokereke Honestly, I'm surprised it isn't already in wide usage.

I hereby release it under CC0. Fly and be free!! [releases it to go splat on the ground]

Kevin Lyda

@mekkaokereke Of course she wasn't intimidated. Does anyone really believe there's a "fight, flight, or narrate" response?

"The last thing I saw on the video call was Bill saying, "Oh look, there's a large bear charging at me intending to eat me" and then the image spun and all I could hear was crunching and gurgling. Damn that fight, flight or narrate response."

ES Michelson

Dear @mekkaokereke

My perspective: People see stuff, like bigness or Blackness, (or even a cloud) and think they understand what it signifies. That is usually not the case.

I hope you're well! Clearly a stressful situation that does take some time to recover from.

Your friend,
ESM

Meznor

@mekkaokereke I'm so sorry that happened to you, and that this kind of shit continues to happen. I promise if I'm observing/witnessing a situation like that I will act like those other guests did too. It may not stop the systemic nature of the problem but one less Karen perpetuating it is one less on the ledger and that's something.

JackieM

@mekkaokereke man oh man what goes through these bigots’ minds?!? I’m glad it turned out ok. I hope and pray this is a symptom of a changing culture. I remember when I started to notice that a homophobe was likely to be the odd one out instead of getting implicit or explicit support from the crowd. It made a big difference. Though clearly those gains aren’t guaranteed.

isotope239🥸💻📚🇺🇦

@mekkaokereke For cryin' out loud, what does being big (or black or male/female or anything else) have to do with it? You were politely standing in line, doing your best to mind your own business, and that entitled white creep blithely assumed that everyone else would cheer her on. I'm very pleased to hear that she was dead wrong and the hotel staff and security stepped up to the plate!

Sampath Pāṇini ®

@mekkaokereke Wow.

Just wow.

The stars aligned with other humans being good people with high character and strong moral conviction.

DELETED

@mekkaokereke how did the angry dude react through this? just faded into the background?

mekka okereke :verified:

Giant Black man in the US decision tree

1) OK, this white man just accidentally cut in front of me. Should I even say anything? Or let it slide?

2) OK, I said something. Now he seems very angry! He thinks I am cutting him in line! Should I say anything? Or let it slide?

3) OK, Karen just yelled at both of us to "Shut up" Should I just shut up?

4) OK, she called security on me. Should I stick around? Or is the smart move to leave now?

Answers to questions are governed by my situational power

Meow :verified:

@mekkaokereke Stick around. Security guards aren't police in most areas. The most they can do is be a pain in the ass. As easier said than done as this is, just don't lose your cool. Don't give the guard or the other two people one bit of power over you.

mekka okereke :verified:

Just to maintain sanity, the answer is almost always "let it slide." 🤷🏿‍♂️

Has to be.

dria :firefox: :redhat:

@mekkaokereke I'm so sorry you have to deal with shit like that.

Piers Cawley

@mekkaokereke why didn't you this time, if you don't mind my asking?

mekka okereke :verified:

@pdcawley

Me personally? I can't let every single thing slide.
I don't think it's healthy to swallow your soul at every interaction. It's important to advocate for yourself.

But I didn't know that dude was going to get all angry. If I did, I probably wouldn't have said anything. It's just one spot. Not worth it. No good to be had from conversing with angry people. 🤷🏿‍♂️

But when Karen tried that, she was so out of pocket that everyone saw it. Staff, other guests etc. Low risk for me, big gain.

@pdcawley

Me personally? I can't let every single thing slide.
I don't think it's healthy to swallow your soul at every interaction. It's important to advocate for yourself.

But I didn't know that dude was going to get all angry. If I did, I probably wouldn't have said anything. It's just one spot. Not worth it. No good to be had from conversing with angry people. 🤷🏿‍♂️

Piers Cawley

@mekkaokereke thanks for the answer.

I'm very glad you got the good ending.

yaygya

@mekkaokereke I'm Canadian. I hear about racism and other safety issues in the US all the time, and yet my father, who worked in the USA in the '90s, still has the belief that it's a promised land that's absolutely perfect with no problems, just because of money.

Canada may be having its troubles right now, but I feel much, much more safer and welcomed here than I would in the US, especially the US of today. Seriously, I have no idea how you all manage to deal with this on a daily basis.

Philip Mallegol-Hansen

@mekkaokereke I’m sorry that happened to you, it’s fucked up.

And even more so, I’m sorry it probably isn’t even that unusual of a situation.

JustAFrog

@mekkaokereke Always great when a racist piece of shit discovers not every white person is on board with their injustice.

Crashing into cold hard reality.

Finley Ⓥ

@mekkaokereke While I wouldn't compare out struggles, as a butch trans woman I feel this.

A trans woman I know was hate-crimed by hotel security in full view of everyone, and nobody did anything. She ended up in the hospital.

I know a butch woman who's been assaulted by straight women for wanting to use the women's bathroom, and security did absolutely nothing about it. In a gay bar.

The moment security gets involved, I'm going into "let it slide" mode. The stakes are too high.

Kat Marchán 🐈

@mekkaokereke so glad you’re safe. It’s nice when you get a glimmer of hope in humanity :)

Aquarabbit 😷

@mekkaokereke My protective attitude toward my new Mastodon acquaintances indicates that you may wish to disappear for now ... and maybe exact revenge later, both on the white dude and spiteful Karen.

McNulla

@mekkaokereke
The self control that you need to have must be great.

My temper, AKA less self control, is part of my white privilege.

birdpoof

@mekkaokereke

I am SO GLAD there were white witness allies that stuck around. The hotel security with their video evidence probably still would have ended up at the same conclusion, but more public allies in the mix always helps.

White allies, you have way more power in regular situations like this than you think. (And yes, it's rather regular, sadly.)

DELETED

@mekkaokereke

your error was in merely existing in the vicinity of the entitled (/s)

Beverley

@mekkaokereke No comfort, but I hate that you have to weigh up your actions in this way.

I know this is your reality.

I also know I'll never fully understand because no matter how appalled I am, I'm not the one 'feeling' it, experiencing it.

I'm sorry I have nothing but my solidarity to offer. Go well.

Amy (She/Her)

@mekkaokereke I'm glad the other guests told security what really happened and that it deescalated. I'm sorry you had to deal with such a character.

22

@mekkaokereke sending hugs 🫶

What’s always fascinated me, ever since 9/11 made me (big brown dude) someone to fear, is how, once in a while I notice someone getting intimidated by me but I’ve never ever come close to this Karen-style “I will now activate cruelty mode just because I can” thing. Because I’m coded South Asian/Middle East, I just don’t trigger that sadistic response. It’s something folks only inflict on Black victims (as far as I know!, Indo-Pak/Middle East family, please tell me if you’ve found otherwise).

Gods know we brown folks face tons of challenges in this country but we are still playing America on easy mode compared to our beloved Black sibs 😢

@mekkaokereke sending hugs 🫶

What’s always fascinated me, ever since 9/11 made me (big brown dude) someone to fear, is how, once in a while I notice someone getting intimidated by me but I’ve never ever come close to this Karen-style “I will now activate cruelty mode just because I can” thing. Because I’m coded South Asian/Middle East, I just don’t trigger that sadistic response. It’s something folks only inflict on Black victims (as far as I know!, Indo-Pak/Middle East family, please tell me if...

Sampath Pāṇini ®

@22 @mekkaokereke
My ethnic background is also South Asian and the only time I’ve personally experienced this cruelty mode activated was in the months and years after 9/11.

CassandraZeroCovid

@paninid @22 @mekkaokereke

Yes, my first thought in answer to his question was the Siek man who was killed following 9/11.

cate

@mekkaokereke what a garbage woman, I’m so sorry that happened to you and glad security called her on her bs.

Brian Campbell

@mekkaokereke I've seen a woman try to use this kind of "I felt intimidated" tactics against my father, who's a tall skinny white dude. She was a roommate of my brother and his girlfriend, things got weird, they tried to ask her to move out and things got weirder, and so they asked my father over to see if he could help. She decided to file for a restraining order against my father, got a temporary one and a court date, but got laughed out of court as nothing he'd done had ever been intimidating

Brian Campbell

@mekkaokereke The affidavit was a work of art. She described a tall man with a gold tooth and a large Stetson cowboy hat lunging out of the bushes at her.

He has a gold tooth, and a Stetson fedora. He was just walking around the bush to go into the yard, and she was leaving. They actually had a pleasant conversation about her cats on that particular occasion.

But because he'd gotten involved in the dispute between my brother and her, she tried to weaponize the legal system against him

Liz Ellis She/Her🌳

@mekkaokereke so she saw all the Karen memes, and all the white woman tears videos and took them as rules to live by?
Glad other guests and security had your back.

BlackDutchSnark

@mekkaokereke I’m glad security was doing their job properly. But the front desk shouldn’t have called security on you but on her…she initiated contact and was abusive to you. What a racist b!tch!!

bjb :devuannew: :emacs:

@johnettesnuggs @mekkaokereke The way I read it, SHE reached over the front desk and used the front desk's phone to call security.

mekka okereke :verified:

@johnettesnuggs

Well, the front desk acted as they have to. Once someone asks for security, they have to call them.🤷🏿‍♂️

This is similar to how if someone calls 911 on a Black person minding their business, cops have to respond. Most cops hate receiving these calls! Because they know that they have to make contact with an innocent Black person that was just minding their business.

The cops have to ID the suspect, but the law says that the suspect doesn't have to give ID. Lose/lose for the cop.🙂🙃

@johnettesnuggs

Well, the front desk acted as they have to. Once someone asks for security, they have to call them.🤷🏿‍♂️

This is similar to how if someone calls 911 on a Black person minding their business, cops have to respond. Most cops hate receiving these calls! Because they know that they have to make contact with an innocent Black person that was just minding their business.

Marge 吴静玫

@mekkaokereke Wow. Reading the rest of this, I am really glad it turned out ok. No one deserves to even think that they could be in mortal danger over this bullshit.

bttk

@mekkaokereke "Ma'am. We have security cameras. Watch this 50k view TikTok we posted 5 minutes ago."

Sharkgirl Transpiring

@mekkaokereke lordy lord! What an absolute weirdo! Clearly someone who is in the habit of abusing her white womanhood and status to take her feelings out on others.

Also, kinda nice to hear that people are responding in a more helpful and responsive manner all around. Like, the fact that the white bystanders were primed to not just let things play out in a bad way matters and that's good to hear because I know it often hasn't been that way.

Glad you're okay either way

Danetteb

@mekkaokereke unbelievable and yet completely believable. I am so glad the hotel staff didn't buy into her bullshit

DELETED

@mekkaokereke And this is why i have a deep hatred for the term BOTH SIDES!!. Not just because adults in schools do it when an innocent kid is being bullied.

But because it's used in politics to give republicans/conservatives a leg up when they clearly don't need it. Done for the exact same reasons that lady did it with you.

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