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mekka okereke :verified:

Just to maintain sanity, the answer is almost always "let it slide." 🤷🏿‍♂️

Has to be.

12 comments
dria :firefox: :redhat:

@mekkaokereke I'm so sorry you have to deal with shit like that.

Piers Cawley

@mekkaokereke why didn't you this time, if you don't mind my asking?

mekka okereke :verified:

@pdcawley

Me personally? I can't let every single thing slide.
I don't think it's healthy to swallow your soul at every interaction. It's important to advocate for yourself.

But I didn't know that dude was going to get all angry. If I did, I probably wouldn't have said anything. It's just one spot. Not worth it. No good to be had from conversing with angry people. 🤷🏿‍♂️

But when Karen tried that, she was so out of pocket that everyone saw it. Staff, other guests etc. Low risk for me, big gain.

@pdcawley

Me personally? I can't let every single thing slide.
I don't think it's healthy to swallow your soul at every interaction. It's important to advocate for yourself.

But I didn't know that dude was going to get all angry. If I did, I probably wouldn't have said anything. It's just one spot. Not worth it. No good to be had from conversing with angry people. 🤷🏿‍♂️

Piers Cawley

@mekkaokereke thanks for the answer.

I'm very glad you got the good ending.

insecurity princess 🌈💖🔥

@mekkaokereke
> "I can't let every single thing slide.
I don't think it's healthy to swallow your soul at every interaction. It's important to advocate for yourself."

Thanks for talking through this. I have a really hard time finding the right balance of risk in engaging vs risk of losing myself in advocating for myself too rarely.

yaygya

@mekkaokereke I'm Canadian. I hear about racism and other safety issues in the US all the time, and yet my father, who worked in the USA in the '90s, still has the belief that it's a promised land that's absolutely perfect with no problems, just because of money.

Canada may be having its troubles right now, but I feel much, much more safer and welcomed here than I would in the US, especially the US of today. Seriously, I have no idea how you all manage to deal with this on a daily basis.

Philip Mallegol-Hansen

@mekkaokereke I’m sorry that happened to you, it’s fucked up.

And even more so, I’m sorry it probably isn’t even that unusual of a situation.

JustAFrog

@mekkaokereke Always great when a racist piece of shit discovers not every white person is on board with their injustice.

Crashing into cold hard reality.

Finley Ⓥ

@mekkaokereke While I wouldn't compare out struggles, as a butch trans woman I feel this.

A trans woman I know was hate-crimed by hotel security in full view of everyone, and nobody did anything. She ended up in the hospital.

I know a butch woman who's been assaulted by straight women for wanting to use the women's bathroom, and security did absolutely nothing about it. In a gay bar.

The moment security gets involved, I'm going into "let it slide" mode. The stakes are too high.

Kat Marchán 🐈

@mekkaokereke so glad you’re safe. It’s nice when you get a glimmer of hope in humanity :)

Chris

@mekkaokereke Very sorry to read this story, but I am glad it had a better ending. Much love to you and your family.

Shepherdess

@mekkaokereke oof, that situation sucks green fuzzy rocks and I’m glad that you weren’t harmed further and folks had your back.

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