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"Don't like posts, boost them." "Don't block people, it's antisocial." Babies, use this service however you like and in ways that bring you and your friends the most joy and the best sense of safety. Hammer the like button if you want. Block whoever you feel like, for whatever reason you want. You don't owe anybody else engagement in the form they might prefer - or at all. 131 comments
 Muting/blocking people is self-care. Claiming it's antisocial is antisocial.  @rysiek @thekitmalone muting/blocking is just like how you'd decide not to interact with or pay attention to some people in the offline world  Yeah, this is really important to realise. It is always okay to block or mute for any reason! It isn't an offensive thing to do on here! It's just a choice of what you want to see, and it isn't necessarily any kind of comment on the objective value of the account you block. (I guess only exception would be some kind of public body, they shouldn't really be blocking their own citizens. But those kinds of accounts are only a tiny minority.) It happened to me a while ago: I had a discussion with someone who, after a while, decided they didn't want to think about my arguments any longer: I was blocked. What I had not anticipated: I no longer had access to the other person's original toots, those that I had answered. My answers were now orphaned. It did feel a bit rude to have that done to me. You say I should not mind? @dj3ei @feditips @rysiek @thekitmalone You can mind all you like. And it may have been rude. But you're not owed access to that person. Agreed. "Block as you want" seems to be part of the current Fediverse code of conduct. I feel that code could be improved upon, but admit I'm not sure how. If blocking happens, one of the two people involved is probably being rude already. Maybe the code of conduct improvement I'd like to see needs a better world than the one where that happens, to begin with. I'm uncertain. @dj3ei @feditips @rysiek @thekitmalone The rule applies to real life interactions as well though. Noone owes another person their attention, outside of items directly affecting that persons safety and wellbeing. It's NICE if people communicate why they need to disengage, but they have every right to do so regardless.  @dj3ei @feditips @rysiek @thekitmalone I’ve blocked everyone pretending to be Elon since they’re probably all him. @Aleggra @feditips @rysiek @thekitmalone Just goes to show that self care can indeed be proactive! @rysiek @thekitmalone Amen. Sometimes people try to get into arguments and I’m way too old for internet arguments. The block button is right there!  @rysiek @thekitmalone came here to say that. In fact, since blocking someone only effects me, I don't see how it can be anti-social, anyway. Might as well say that not turning up to a concert is antisocial. @fishidwardrobe@mastodon.me.uk @rysiek@mstdn.social @thekitmalone@hoosier.social Blocking someone also prevents them from mentioning you in a reply. I think *that's* where the "antisocial" angle comes from. @rysiek @thekitmalone , this so much. My life is now 'people part of the solution' and 'people not part of the solution'. I can come off toxic, but I am just boldly tired of the inhumanity of our species. Sorry, NTs, I don't like your 'survival of the fittest'. If that's the case, then cool for being a successful replacement cog. I'm more than a means of mindless continuance for this species. @rysiek @thekitmalone plenty of racism, antisemitism, and patronizing/condescending folks to block around here. Report button is handy too. @themastodoning humans gonna human. But at least there are communities and community leaders (admins, moderators) around here who are willing to step up and step in. We need more of them, and we're nowhere near where we need to be for all people to feel safe and welcome, of course. More work is always needed. @thekitmalone yep. I've not had to block anyone here yet but it's absolutely essential on any social media, even nice semi-forum-like Masto, to have the option to block. It's inevitable there'll be *someone*. As for likes, I never liked it when #Twitter made them boost stuff up in the algorithm to begin with. I love having my like button that's just a like button back.  @thekitmalone I like stuff that I like and I boost it when I think that my followers should see it. It's that simple  @thekitmalone One of the best things about Mastodon is that it is not for the sort of people you'd want to block in the first place. @alexanderhay it's generally friendlier right now, although I've had a few run ins with hate speech and trolls already. (Fewer than anywhere else.) I do think that it's inevitable that it'll get worse if the user base grows. But I don't think it'll ever be as bad as traditional social media just on account of the fact that moderation here is a lot more directly accountable to users. @alexanderhay @thekitmalone Agreed, which is why I'm much more free with the block button than I ever was in the other place. Block block blockity blockity block. On Brirbsite I felt I had to put up with a certain degree of arseholery. I don't here. @alexanderhay @thekitmalone for now. But if it is going to grow bigger, at some point it will need to reach the types of people that you don’t want here.  @alexanderhay @ix9 @thekitmalone Exactly. There is no way this place needs to make the far right, transphobes, antisemitic cranks, Tate fans, etc. welcome in order to succeed. It's a massive selling point that they aren't.  @thekitmalone I agree with one small part (‘don't block people’): mute people instead blocking them because some mastodon instances alert person when someone blocked them and they go out of their way to annoy you. muting doesn't have this problem @brawaru @thekitmalone That's cute if they do, then I'll block the instance from my use. I have yet to see a use case for someone using a bot to publicize someone being blocked that isn't to kick off a trolling campaign. If I'm wrong, I'd love to hear a positive use for it. @thekitmalone @thekitmalone I don't think I have blocked anyone (haven't checked), but I have muted some people and I use filters fairly liberally. I consider that a combination of self-care and personal feed curation. There's certainly a number of things that people I follow, and people who participate in tags I am interested in, clearly want to talk about, but which I have no interest in. Instead of throwing the proverbial baby out with the bathwater, I grab myself a snack while they're talking about those. @thekitmalone With all due respect to whomever says it's antisocial to block people... wtf is wrong with them? @WhyNotZoidberg it's a thing I've seen pretty often here, typically from techy types, mostly dudes. @WhyNotZoidberg tbh I'd say anyone who doesn't think folks should get to block them is already waiving a big old red flag @thekitmalone imo you shouldn't be able to prevent me from speaking, but you should be free to look away and ignore me if you want. @thekitmalone @WhyNotZoidberg as one very wise therapist once told me Anyone who has an issue with you erecting a healthy boundary has a vested interest in it not being there Block buttons are boundaries and I agree. It’s a red flag because they seem to legitimately have the expectation that you should have a worse or aggravating experience in the interest of listening to their drivel rather than learning to handle rejection gracefully @WhyNotZoidberg @thekitmalone right? No. No, I don’t think I will because I have better things to do with my time internet rando. Also personally I feel strongly about not legitimizing bad faith inquiries with good faith evidence or like any attention whatsoever but that’s my personal opinion on that. Not always the easiest to stick to because I’m human and even I have a limit on nonsense but I try. @WhyNotZoidberg @thekitmalone I should note - a limit on the bad faith nonsense of others. On my own nonsense and shenanigans? All day every day, on my bullshit and I appreciate the nonsense and general tomfoolery of other silly geese @FeralBogHimbo @thekitmalone As an immigrant from Birdsite I have taken the mantra "just block and move on" with me. It's even more important here if you are a small but not personal Instance (like me) because you can bring them with you like seagulls crapping all over the Instance.  I'd like offer them a blue checkmark (like the bird place has), and tell them that it makes them unblockable. Anyone who would want such a thing is a great candidate for me to block. Let's let them identify themselves! (Yes, that would be unethical, and so we wouldn't do it. But a guy can dream, can't he?) @thekitmalone (Answering my own post here but a metaphor has been rattling in my brain all day): Are these people saying you shouldn't have the right to deny entry to your home if someone you don't want to visit you ring your doorbell? @thekitmalone yeah, no to both of those. It's my experience, bruh... those folks can go dictate “etiquette” somewhere else. @thekitmalone@hoosier.social Amen to that! Especially given that a lot of people using ActivityPub implementations, aren't even on Mastodon, nor subject to its norms. Ha! Exactly. It is my little corner of this space, and I will engage or not as I see fit. Yes, you bet I use the block button generously and DGAF if someone whines "that is antisocial." And yes, I have blocked some here (this place may be nice but it is not Nirvana. There is always an asshole or two). @Kit Malone Yes, think of it. Would anyone consider it antisocial if you don't want to engage in a conversation with every single person you happen to meet...?
Maybe Crocodile Dundee but few others I think. @thekitmalone You can also disable boosts from followers whose unwelcomed boosts show up in your timeline. Simply click on the ... of the boost's author and pick the option to disable boosts from that particular follower. @thekitmalone @donmelton Yup! I see the “don’t block them” as the textualized “you need to smile more.” 🔪🔪🔪  @LeslieBurns @thekitmalone @donmelton Once in a while I post something that gets a few more boosts, and almost inevitably I get follows from blank accounts without avatars, profile text, or any post history. I always block those. I want to connect with people, not ghost accounts. @PalmAndNeedle @LeslieBurns @donmelton I feel like I saw that same problem on Birdsite, and yeah, it's a problem. I wonder, though, if Fediverse currently has a larger than normal number of "lurkers." Maybe early adopters who aren't doing much with it but who are kinda hovering and waiting to see what shakes out.  @thekitmalone YES! Provided, of course, you understand what effect the various things you do will have. People used to twitter, for instance, may need to be reminded that liking posts will have zero effect on their visibility to others and that if they do want to amplify them they'll have to boost. But otherwise, YES! @thekitmalone  @thekitmalone never been much of a blocker. Muting is enough for me unless i come across an account that blocked me so I return the treatment. I hear that. I do quibble at the idea that an echo-chamber is the only reason or outcome for liberally blocking some folks. My own is that I work in high-profile advocacy on controversial issues and have an awful lot of active, credible threats and tend to block the moment someone gives me a red flag. I know that someone I've blocked can still get to my TL -- but any obstacle is helpful. Legit dangerous people take an interest in my professional doings. @thekitmalone of course. Keep your sanity. I’m a small presence and don’t attract the “crazies” like high profile accounts do. @thekitmalone @thekitmalone I think the "Boost, don't like" is driven in small part by people who want to see those follower/impression count numbers go up. Obviously, if you like something enough to want it on your page, boost away. Don't let others tell you how to use a decentralized platform... @mrtomlegit Absolutely. And I think some of it is, like, #Fediverse activism - folks wanna see more, richer engagement and that's one way to encourage it. And I'm real sympathetic to that. But I really think that's one place where the standard social media wisdom is still the best. Produce interesting content, be consistent, and more people will want to share it with their friends! @thekitmalone I already get way more interaction on here than I ever did on Twitter and my content is nothing special. "Don't like posts, boost them. Don't block people, it's antisocial." Jiminy Christmas. That sounds like advice from somebody who just came to the Fedi and desperately wants it to be the same crabs-in-a-bucket middle-school popularity contest they just left behind on the bird site.  @thekitmalone Hell yeah, block and mute awareness!! Also, if I may promote the filtering features, allowing you to yeet certain topics from your view based on keywords or phrases, allowing you to curate your experience even further! @toydragon I *love* the robust filtering options. Really love the advanced interface too - and I'm hoping for more improvements (lists that allow you to add hashtags would really help). Generally, though, I love that I can actually provide myself with a number of different feeds with different focuses and don't have to pay attention to them all at once.  @thekitmalone While you're right, what distinguishes this place from Twitter or Facebook is that people make an effort to be kind and reasonable, so at least consider trying to adopt the norms that exist here, as they're the reason why there's so much less toxicity. I agree it's less toxic, but I disagree that that's entirely down to the norms here. (the existing community is in many ways fantastic, tho). But I've already received hate speech and threats, although much much less than elsewhere. I think it's down to size, and to accessibility of instance moderation. As some instances get big, and as adoption goes up - I think more trolling and rudeness is inevitable. I don't think we can rely on "people are just nicer here" for long. @thekitmalone ... I mean, if "boost" was supposed to be what you use to like things, why would there be a "like"? Boost and like are different, so use them differently!  @thekitmalone I block people when I find their social behavior unpleasant. No need to have that kind of interactions in my life.  @thekitmalone It's not because Mastodon is more toxic. Quite the opposite. Mastodon's relatively pristine environment is more worthy of protecting. Twitter's polluted environment serves to remind us what happens when trolls don't get blocked. @thekitmalone @thekitmalone ironically, people making the argument "don't block people" are among the people i'm most likely to block  @thekitmalone blocking people isn't anti social, it's good for you. If you're constantly having to get admins involved in disputes - you are the problem.  THIS! Why is it that people think they're entitled to other people's precious time and energy? WHERE DID THIS COME FROM? If some random stranger came up to you in the street and started shouting at you, would you feel you owed them a civil conversation? Block at the drop of a hat. Block rude people because *you owe no-one your time or even an explanation of why you're blocking them.* This goes double for those of us struggling with long-term health problems. @thekitmalone Affirming advice on *Mastodon* of all places? Must be a blue moon! I'll take it~   @thekitmalone  Seriously. Maybe you just like a post, but know that your friends or family might not. And maybe a user is just toxic and needs to be blocked. @thekitmalone Love this. Cannot over-emphasize how much. Natural circles will develop, evolutionary puddles as it were. And that is okay... with natural and expected caveats and limitations to this analogy. (I am now following #evolutionarypuddles) The only courtesy I would do for even the most vile encounter unless I am somehow reasonably overly emotional would be to change "Babies" to something like "Countrymen" or "Friends" or the like... kudos, random friend.  @thekitmalone this. Also people think liking doesn't have an effect on visibility. Posts with many likes are featured in the "explore" tab on different servers. @thekitmalone even my hometown sports teams.for that matter.  @thekitmalone - Say. About that “Like” button. The service doesn’t seem to record/report it with much accuracy. I can “like” a post and come back 30 seconds later and it still registers “0.” @thekitmalone @brandonscript Pretty sure I’d block someone just for telling me I shouldn’t block people. 😂  @thekitmalone Over 8 billion people on the planet, surely it's okay if a few of us find someone else to talk to after being blocked. “Don’t block people…” pff, fuck that, block anybody you never want to hear from again, for any reason at all. It’s cathartic. @thekitmalone This! No one person has the right to dictate how you live and like and dislike, except yourself. @thekitmalone @thekitmalone yeah I will block all Nazis and chuds I wish. I don't care about algorithm. I boost and like posts and liking posts is far more helpful in my view.   @thekitmalone I usually find that if I like something, it's also worth boosting, so I have no problem doing both! Not always, but very often. I've noticed most people do the same for me. @thekitmalone I generally agree with you, so long as it doesn't lead to public shaming of people without an opportunity to defend themselves. It's okay to block anyone for any reason. It's not okay to make it your mission to have someone isolated for any reason. I've seen far too many people burned by an angry mob not to mention the risk ETA: There are of course cases where it's appropriate to isolate bad actors but we're talking about blocking for any reason here  That's right. If they don't like what you toot, they don't have to follow you. 🤷🏻♀️  @thekitmalone I don't boost a lot of posts, but this one deserves all the attention I can give it.  @thekitmalone I do understand making folks aware of the difference between liking and boosting though. @thekitmalone the sad part about this remark, is the fact it has to be said at all. By you posting this it means some people actually try to make others feel “bad” for “for silencing their voice”. All the while those people don’t think about WHY they were blocked. Instead of looking inward they look outward and blame others for being antisocial. It’s a sad sad World Wide Web |
Gregory's Server
@thekitmalone
Amen. Just because you appreciate something doesn't mean you want it on your home page.