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T Chu 朱

In case anyone else needed a good belly laugh today.

70 comments
Greg

@chu Thank you. I will never ever get sick of Cybertruck schadenfreude. Natural justice is my favourite kind of justice.

Bob LeFridge

@greg @chu

Here's the link for anyone interested. But beware, Futurism chooses to display its text in light grey on a white background which is hard to read.

futurism.com/cybertruck-brick-

#wankpanzer

Betterifyouneil

@BobLefridge @greg @chu

---
Don't wash in the sun and No windshield wiper fluid either?

Auto car wash will void warranty?

Sounds like the vehicle is not made to withstand basic wear and tear. It is not consumer ready.

Everyone get together and file a class action law suit.

#RustyMusky

T Chu 朱

@Betterifyouneil @BobLefridge @greg

A friend who may need to replace a car soon was just chatting to me why he'd never buy a Tesla.

*copied and pasted from our chat*

the reason is theya re designed like cellphones
you must know how serviceable a cellphone is right?
the body of a tesla is made from a single block of metal and assembled in a very weird way that is basically unservicable
the big car manufacturers have so much experience in designing cars everything can be serviced and replaced on them
and i'm talkign structurally
let alone everything else
another example is teslas use a bus to electronically keep the car together.. i.e. the left turn light communicates through a network to know when to turn on and off.. this saves a lot of wires... but it also means one fault in the network adn the entire car stops working
as opposed to a fault in the left turn signal means the left turn light stops working..
here's a real world example with my old car.. during the july 8th flood my car became a boat
it lost traction and floated accross the coad
y dash board died and all eledctrical systems went down
BUT my engine still kept going and i was able to put it into gear and drive off on the other side
when my dash came back on all the warning lights were on.. but my car still was able to drive
it's over engineered to the max
my cars electronics were never the same but thigns are really isolated and redundant in modern cars
in ev's less so... but i was talking structurally when comparing teslas and normal car manufacturers.. adn normal cars are superior to teslas because of their over engineering
and that crosses over to ev's made by the big 5
but the design philosophy of cellphones is in every aspect of a tesla.. so i would never buy nor recommend one to anyone
also because elon
they are neat as any flagship cellphone is super neat.. but that's it

@Betterifyouneil @BobLefridge @greg

A friend who may need to replace a car soon was just chatting to me why he'd never buy a Tesla.

*copied and pasted from our chat*

the reason is theya re designed like cellphones
you must know how serviceable a cellphone is right?
the body of a tesla is made from a single block of metal and assembled in a very weird way that is basically unservicable
the big car manufacturers have so much experience in designing cars everything can be serviced and replaced on them

Betterifyouneil

@chu @BobLefridge @greg

That's a great perspective. Musky made a drivable iPhone entangled in its own universe. Maybe rose gold will be the next upgrade, cost twice as much, and still lack water resistance.

Kierkegaanks regretfully

@chu @Betterifyouneil @BobLefridge @greg ya, tesla is a tech company trying to rediscover car design without 150 years of iterative knowhow … so, as you say, they’re basically ipads on wheels. But uglier

ErnstGucker

@greg @Betterifyouneil @chu @BobLefridge
Agree totally with your friend. That is why I prefer a Volvo EX40 or a Mercedes EQA over a Tesla.
Tesla is nice designed and has a slightly superior range. But it lacks in other areas I consider more apt for me.

Dmian

@chu @Betterifyouneil @BobLefridge @greg I think the bus your friend is referring to is CAN bus. It's used in ALL modern cars, ICE, hybrid or EVs. Basically, if your car has automatic door locks, it most probably uses CAN bus. It's been a standard in the industry for decades now. And no, a fail in a CAN bus node doesn't bring the whole system down. CAN bus is fault-tolerant, and you should really do an awful implementation to allow a non-critical node to bring the system down.

Dmian

@chu @Betterifyouneil @BobLefridge @greg I want to clarify that I'm not defending Testa. I wouldn't buy one if I had the money. But CAN bus is not the problem. They have horrendous quality control, and their post-sales services are pretty bad. Their biggest merit is putting EVs in the spotlight. But there are way better options out there.

Cam 🌲

@BobLefridge @greg @chu if you use a browser like Opera or Vivaldi, they both have a 'force black background with white text's option in their Accessibility settings. At least on android...

Bob LeFridge

@camless @greg @chu

While most browsers have the option, I'll never understand any web designer using difficult to read combinations as their default.

ThisLeeNoble

@BobLefridge I like the optimism of saying "don't tell them you took it to a car wash", like they wouldn't just check the camera logs without you knowing.

Knud Jahnke

@BobLefridge @greg @chu

And it would like to share tracking and cookies with 1282 "technology partners".

Wilfried Klaebe

@thestrangelet And not a Panzer at all, those are built to survive as much as possible.

@chu

𝐿𝒶𝓃𝒶

@chu every single thing I ever hear about this enormous clustertruck of a vehicle is worse and funnier than the last.

T Chu 朱

@Lana

So hard not to enjoy the schadenfreude.

philbee

@chu @Lana Why wouldn't you want to enjoy it, and to the max, too?

Michael Gemar

@Lana @chu It’s the Humane AI Pin of trucks.

Leaping Woman

@chu the tiny "cyber paperweight" in the upper left is the best part.

Hot Dog Water

@chu

I’m really curious about how they withstand a rainstorm. The coming stories of splitting apart doing a u-ee will be… expected.

John Linton Roberson

@chu (there is no abbreviation for my kind of laughter right now)

Spatula

@chu Makes me wonder what'll happen to them if it rains.

MrAptronym

@chu Remember when Musk said the Cybertruck would be able to cross small bodies of water?

Forrest

@chu “waterproof enough to serve briefly as a boat”😆

Fripi

@chu @pallenberg das ist doch was zum kurz lachen 😅

me_valentijn

@chu

The dystopian future is gonna be lit. Gangs of techbros marauding around the suburbs in Cybertrucks, and little kids trying to dodge them while spraying them with garden hoses 😬

Kevin Karhan :verified:

@chu The #CyberTruck has worse #QualityControl and #Craftsmanship than the fucking #Trabant P601 and that thing was a cheap piece of fiber-reinforced phenolic resin on steel tubes with a two-cylinder, two-stroke air-cooled engine that couldn't even bother to have a fuel pump but had to be gravity-fed!

Yet their panel gaps were far less crooked and their cars don't get stained by rain dying up on their surface...

Even the #DeLoream #DMC12 did that #Sheetmetal look better and didn't have the #rust issues...

#Tesla #RustBucket #CyberRust #EpicFail #Wankpanzer #Wanker #WankerCar #SuperUselessVehicle

@chu The #CyberTruck has worse #QualityControl and #Craftsmanship than the fucking #Trabant P601 and that thing was a cheap piece of fiber-reinforced phenolic resin on steel tubes with a two-cylinder, two-stroke air-cooled engine that couldn't even bother to have a fuel pump but had to be gravity-fed!

kami_kadse

@kkarhan @chu

as one having owned a Trabant some decades ago I can tell you it's conceptually exactly what one would want when combining indivdualist transit for the whole population and some efficiency in production and maintenance: it didn't waste fuel on mass, was *completely* self-serviceable and could fit the transport needs of a small family. (fuel efficiency was only okay when regarding the simplicity of the engine)

Kevin Karhan :verified:

@kami_kadse @chu Shure, also its scarcity forced the #GDR to maintain #PublicTransport networks as a necessary utility...

Also yeah, the Trabant with it's low compression two-stroke just works by virtue of being for the most part 1950s motorcycle tech just with doible the wheels and a plastic cabin and steel tubing around...

In fact, if it wasn't a regular 2+2 car, I'd consider it a #PersonalLightVehicle by virtue of being engineered to simplicity.
github.com/KBtechnologies/PLV

@kami_kadse @chu Shure, also its scarcity forced the #GDR to maintain #PublicTransport networks as a necessary utility...

Also yeah, the Trabant with it's low compression two-stroke just works by virtue of being for the most part 1950s motorcycle tech just with doible the wheels and a plastic cabin and steel tubing around...

kami_kadse

@kkarhan @chu

die PLV of the time and day would be the "Krause Duo" 😸

Kevin Karhan :verified:

@kami_kadse @chu I did in fact list it as such in the documentation of said Project / Concept...

Ariane :btfly: Noxie

@chu sauce : futurism.com/cybertruck-brick- :ablobreach:
The rest of the story while not as fun gives a bit more context for people not following the subject :blob_cat:

porrporr

@chu there is no carwash in postapocalyptic Musk worlds! ^^

💬

@chu @jimbob so not the noise you want to hear from a big electrical system that’s just suffered water damage

Paul-Gabriel Wiener

@chu I guess they're just expecting that car washes won't exist in a post-apocalyptic world. That's actually reasonable.

Jack Yan (甄爵恩)

@chu All front, no substance. Very true to the Elon Musk brand!

Marcel Bischoff

@chu So that’s a “car” that’s incompatible with a “car wash”, right? The sheer stupidity of the modern age and its designers is breathtaking.

Ada :v_trans: :v_pan:​

@chu Norway has some of the highest ownership % by population of both EVs and Tesla's.

Cybertrucks would neither be allowed on, nor survive our roads & weather if it can't handle a car wash :ms_laughing:

Reina :maybe_verified:

@iamada @chu I also seriously hope it isn't legal here. Cars are death machines already, but this one is so sharp and heavy that if you got driven over by one it would almost guaranteed kill you.

The electrification of cars was a mistake. We should've invested in public transit instead of increasing the weight (and hence the deadliness and road wear and tear) of vehicles. Personal cars should've been banned in cities and replaced with collectively owned cars for the times you do need one.

adritheonly

@chu
So, basically a sculpture of Elon.
Looks and acts like a brute but in reality very sensitive with a lot of care issues.

aeberbach

@chu the Incel Camino is like the incel; does not wash.

🇸 🇭 🇮 🇳 🇲 🇦 🇮

@chu for a bet, I've gone through a carwash on a recumbent bike and both me and the bike came out unharmed (and I was a rotisserie chicken richer, too)

it's cool to know that I - a disabled person and famously a massive whiny bitch - am more robust than a hundred thousand usd wankpanzer

Mx Amber Alex

@chu the car equivalent to $1000 hand wash only t-shirts

fullfathomfive

@chu I love the category they've filed the story in -

Cyber Paperweight / Advanced Transport

genuine lol

yanncphoto

@chu
« Fortunately, in the case of the car wash, captain.ad's vehicle mysteriously started working again after he filed a ticket and went to bed. The vehicle seemingly needed a complete reboot, which was triggered by him holding down the two buttons the night before — but required five excruciating hours to complete. »

Next advice : don‘t drive on rainy days.

SkaveRat 🐀 :verified:

@chu hash was only.

Did anyone check its tag for this icon?

Dan

@chu can survive the apocalypse but not the carwash? Figures

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