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sam henri gold

they had the audacity to ask for a review at 8pm after people have finished their drink of choice. rookie mistake. I’m breaking out the sass in full force to roast this shit table.

A drafted review for the table I’m mad at: All the screws are tightened, everything is put together correctly. And yet, it rocks and sways like a drunkard on a ship. If you put your hand on the surface and move it left to right, the legs will happily oblige. This table is weighted the same in the front as it is in the back, so if you put any weight towards the back of the table, it will slip and fall towards you. I thought my floors were not level so I put felt pads underneath to even it out, but my floors are fine. It’s just a poorly designed product. I had to tape down the front of this table so it wouldn’t flop around and bang into my walls when I drop my keys on it. The clips aren’t even sturdy, they don’t extend enough to hold a tote bag. What am I supposed to hang on it, wired earbuds? In the year of our lord 2023? Like some kind of toothless bumpkin?? When I inevitably wind up in hell for reasons I do not wish to get into in this review, this table will be there for me to drop my Mitsubishi Mirage keys onto. At least there, the base might have melted enough to stay fixed to the goddamn floor.
26 Nov 2023 at 1:09 | Open on hachyderm.io
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