@coldfish @skye

Here are my suggestions for C# and some dialects of SQL:

C#: You have strong opinions about recent changes Unity has made.

Snowflake SQL: You care about making real life things happen, and only care about programming inasmuch as it allows you to do that.

Teradata SQL: You're an insufferable gatekeeper obsessed with shaving milliseconds off your query run time.

ANSI SQL: You would happily live in a cave if you could. You've wondered if a paleo diet is right for you.

SQLite: You get annoyed when people call you a Christian fundamentalist, and make a note to bring it up with your pastor next Sunday.