Aliens arrive: we have killed your leaders and taken...

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Kev

Aliens arrive: we have killed your leaders and taken control of your planet.

Us: oh thank god

Aliens: you are now citizens of ... Wait what

Like 29 Jul 2023 at 14:57 | Open on mastodon.ie

67 comments

Sherra

@alisca 😂 😂 Bring it on, aliens!

29 Jul 2023 at 19:06 | Open on mastodon.ie

kurtsh

@RasherMurphy @alisca This thread is hilarious & had my LMAO this morning! #TeamAlien

31 Jul 2023 at 15:02 | Open on mastodon.social

Doug Warren

@alisca "You will all be given jobs and uniformly provided with only the bare minimum to maintain you in good mental and physical health. Furthermore, education to teach you useful skills and true facts about the universe will be compulsory."

[cheering]

"I don't think this translator is working right, these are all bad things."

30 Jul 2023 at 15:54 | Open on masto.ai

Kev

@DougWar40k "we will force you to work until 50 years old"

Is this even ON

30 Jul 2023 at 16:13 | Open on mastodon.ie

Mike P

@alisca @DougWar40k "None of you will be permitted to occupy privileged positions. All of your voices will be treated equally when determining policy."

30 Jul 2023 at 16:24 | Open on mastodon.social

CellyBlue

@alisca @DougWar40k

30 Jul 2023 at 16:52 | Open on universeodon.com

Cyber Yuki

@alisca @DougWar40k "We will destroy your primitive transport infrastructure and replace it with mass transit; we will also strip you of your fossil fuels and confiscate all your golf courses to build our energy plants instead."

All hail the aliens!!! :blobcheer:

30 Jul 2023 at 17:00 | Open on hackers.town

dibi58

@yuki2501 @alisca @DougWar40k

with escalators ...

... build energy plants off of your roofs, lawns and streets ...

... to build mobile parks

30 Jul 2023 at 20:21 | Open on this.mouse.rocks

GiacomoSansoni

@yuki2501 @alisca @DougWar40k That reminds me of when Japan and Italy adopted anti-war constitutions because they had been defeated in WW2

31 Jul 2023 at 7:59 | Open on social.coop

Maggie Maybe

@yuki2501 @alisca @DougWar40k I was all for only mass transit until covid. Now it seems kind of ablest doesn’t it? If I had to take a bus to go to the doctor I wouldn’t be going to the doctor. It’s bad enough I’m forced to be exposed there.

31 Jul 2023 at 12:02 | Open on hear-me.social

Sirana

@maggiemaybe @yuki2501 @alisca @DougWar40k Ideally there should be affordable options for all needs. :) There are still plenty of abled people for whom it would be less risky to drive a bus or a train instead of their huge 4 seater SUV they only use solo every day though.

31 Jul 2023 at 13:03 | Open on eldritch.cafe

GiacomoSansoni

@maggiemaybe @yuki2501 @alisca @DougWar40k For that issue there are usually parking spots reserved for people with disabilities. In this sense, there's a big difference between a necessity (the mobility of everyone, especially that of people with disabilities) and a vice (worsening one's health due to pollution and lack of exercise). If we choose the former, there can be abundance for all of us. With the latter, even air is too scarce

31 Jul 2023 at 15:41 | Open on social.coop

Gemma 👽

@alisca @DougWar40k
"In all honesty, we did not expect you to be so thrilled about being taken over by aliens..."

*cheering stops*

"...from the planet Breqdulon."

*cheering continues louder, hats are thrown in the air*

30 Jul 2023 at 20:25 | Open on piipitin.fi

Süßes Bienchen

@DougWar40k @alisca
It's a kind of dictatorship, sorry, not for me.
No applause from me, but yes, mentally challenged people will love it.

31 Jul 2023 at 7:51 | Open on mastodon.social

Mia Knox🏳️‍🌈❄️👑

Why are you calling people with another opinion as yours, mentally challenged? If I only have taken your profil into account, I would have red you as a seemingly nice person, agree with most of your points in your profile, but now I have the slight suspicion, that you only live up to your words, as long people act like you want them to & on the same time you're reproducing ableistic patterns by openly calling others mentally challenged in an insulting way.

@Sweetbee

@DougWar40k @alisca

31 Jul 2023 at 8:48 | Open on social.tchncs.de

Süßes Bienchen

@MiaKnox @DougWar40k @alisca
"You will...health.
Meant: You work and get nothing for it. No job selection either.
Then who may sing or become an actor to entertain us?
No one! It's like the Taliban, destroying musical instruments.
....be mandatory.
Yes, only one lesson is imparted, also no choice.
It sounds like camps where you don't have a choice.
Similar to North Korea, that's where the trip should go?
And yes, simple minds want that, Trump fans, Nazis, former GDR residents, etc...

31 Jul 2023 at 9:31 | Open on mastodon.social

Süßes Bienchen

@MiaKnox @DougWar40k @alisca
They don't want anything colorful, nothing different, nothing extraordinary.
Do you really want to live like this?
Someone tells you what to do and you get a bowl of soup for it.
Great world right?

Not really.

Why not live in Freedom?

Simple thinking people, no pressure, just dutifully obedient.
The best soldiers for a false ideology.

31 Jul 2023 at 9:32 | Open on mastodon.social

Mia Knox🏳️‍🌈❄️👑

@Sweetbee
It is a joke, ment to point out flaws in our society, communicate a sort resignation and connecting people via a common feeling. You could have said something like: "sorry I don't find that funny" and it would have been cool. Instead you add an insult to your opinion, disregarding others. Is your own self-esteem and trust in your opinion so low, that you feel urged to lift yourself up through pushing people down?
@DougWar40k @alisca

31 Jul 2023 at 9:55 | Open on social.tchncs.de

Süßes Bienchen

@MiaKnox @DougWar40k @alisca
Dictatorships are like that.
I'm sorry to have hurt your feelings.
I feel superior to Nazis.
Did you forget Capitol on January 6th?
There was also an attempt in Germany.
Of course it's a joke with the alien, but a little reference to the acclaimed system throws you off track?
Nazis are mentally ill.
They suppress those who think differently, so why not the other way around?
If you are maga, then I understand your concern.

31 Jul 2023 at 10:07 | Open on mastodon.social

Süßes Bienchen

@MiaKnox @DougWar40k @alisca
And remember with your rainbow flag, you're a target of them, so be glad that many oppose it.

31 Jul 2023 at 10:09 | Open on mastodon.social

Mia Knox🏳️‍🌈❄️👑

@Sweetbee I am well aware what that means, believe me, but you are not answering the question i asked, instead dancing around your misbehavior.
Why are you insulting people?
It's just not okay.
You can say anything you want to say, that doesn't threatens someone or insults them.
And yet despite your welcoming presentation you reproducing the problem.
Don't you see the mistake in this?
This isn't about fascism, it's about you being abelistic and insulting.

@DougWar40k @alisca

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31 Jul 2023 at 13:02 | Open on social.tchncs.de

kurtsh

@MiaKnox @DougWar40k @alisca Dude's an angry, humorless, self-righteous troll. They tend to live in their parent's basements & exist on both sides of the political spectrum. Their 1st post was your signal to block & move on.

31 Jul 2023 at 15:08 | Open on mastodon.social

Süßes Bienchen

@MiaKnox @DougWar40k @alisca
I don't know if its the translation or what.
But you didn't understand me.
Well i think we can stop now.
It doesn't make sense to continue in this way.

31 Jul 2023 at 15:51 | Open on mastodon.social

Hermey G

@alisca

1 30 Jul 2023 at 16:36 | Open on mastodon.world

शिवदम् Ⓥ

@Bobblegagger I used to say this, before there were cartoons about it. So true!

30 Jul 2023 at 19:41 | Open on mastodon.world

Chaotic Natural 20

@Bobblegagger
When aliens land and hear their equivalent of dueling banjos playing in the background...
@alisca

31 Jul 2023 at 1:04 | Open on tech.lgbt

CellyBlue

@alisca yessssssss.

30 Jul 2023 at 16:51 | Open on universeodon.com

Theosuwb

@celset2 @alisca and roll up their windows! 😂😂👍

30 Jul 2023 at 19:32 | Open on mastodon.social

ChasMusic (he/him)

@celset2 @alisca Alt text: Aliens probably ride past earth, and lock their doors.

30 Jul 2023 at 19:36 | Open on ohai.social

Number Witch :trans_heart:

@ChasMusic @celset2 @alisca "Earth in 5 Lightyears?" roll up windows, hit the gas.

31 Jul 2023 at 7:36 | Open on queer.party

ˈdälfən™🐬 💥 🌊

@celset2 @alisca We’re the bad neighborhood 😂

30 Jul 2023 at 19:45 | Open on universeodon.com

dibi58

@celset2 @alisca

... and ran away forever disgusted ...

🤣

30 Jul 2023 at 20:22 | Open on this.mouse.rocks

EthicalTaxProfessor

@celset2 @alisca

I know *I* would.

30 Jul 2023 at 21:35 | Open on mastodon.social

NormanDunbar

@celset2 @alisca If there is intelligent life on Earth, it's only visiting.

31 Jul 2023 at 9:34 | Open on mastodon.scot

Lisa Hamilton

@alisca 🤣

30 Jul 2023 at 16:59 | Open on vmst.io

Bluedepth

@alisca Enjoy it, you can’t do any worse than we have done. Knock yourselves out. :)

30 Jul 2023 at 17:07 | Open on mastodon.social

epicdemiologist

@alisca Gotta admit, Anaander Mianaai is looking pretty good right now.

30 Jul 2023 at 19:02 | Open on wandering.shop

✡️ רבֿקהלע די לייביכע ✡️

@alisca Nice of the aliens to make us citizens so quickly. Seem like decent overlords

30 Jul 2023 at 19:07 | Open on deadinsi.de

ouinne

@alisca well I would like to request video of the killings though

30 Jul 2023 at 19:19 | Open on wandering.shop

Dickon Hood

@alisca I read this out loud to my other half. Got near the end of the first line. 'Oh, thank god', she said.

30 Jul 2023 at 19:25 | Open on splodge.fluff.org

ˈdälfən™🐬 💥 🌊

@alisca 🤣😂

30 Jul 2023 at 19:46 | Open on universeodon.com

Jan Bosch

@alisca there's a bunch of them hiding over there that you missed

30 Jul 2023 at 19:51 | Open on mastodon.ie

Madame Müde

@alisca took me a while to get the joke because "oh thank god" is the only reasonable answer in 2023... 🙄

30 Jul 2023 at 20:42 | Open on nrw.social

liebach 🏳️‍🌈

@alisca That remind me of this one. :flan_XD:

30 Jul 2023 at 21:12 | Open on bsd.network

Adriano

@alisca "you *sure* you got _all_ of them?"

30 Jul 2023 at 22:13 | Open on lile.cl

Prof West Wing Chicken Shack

@alisca But we have no leaders

30 Jul 2023 at 23:06 | Open on theblower.au

RealGene ☣️

@alisca

30 Jul 2023 at 23:36 | Open on mastodon.online

Slashline

@alisca Stealing this

30 Jul 2023 at 23:54 | Open on lor.sh

Simon

@alisca Unfortunately, our leaders will have sold us as slaves to them already. 😅

31 Jul 2023 at 0:50 | Open on mastodon.social

Xymon

@alisca finally someone new to blame

31 Jul 2023 at 1:48 | Open on mathstodon.xyz

DELETED

@alisca
As they slowly back up into their spaceship. (Big green blob says out of the side of his orifice to bigger green blob.)
"Let's get out of her, Lou! Told you it was too easy".

31 Jul 2023 at 1:50 | Open on mastodon.sdf.org

Outersider 🇵🇸

@alisca Me: Please take me with you, I don't wanna live here!

31 Jul 2023 at 4:30 | Open on social.edist.ro

Adina Shanholtz 🎃

@alisca pretty sure this was straight up a plot of one of the Jordan Peele Twilight Zone eps

31 Jul 2023 at 4:34 | Open on octodon.social

Bishop Joey (he/him)

@alisca I, for one, welcome, etc.

31 Jul 2023 at 6:40 | Open on writing.exchange

Kris

@alisca I can easily identify with this.

31 Jul 2023 at 7:00 | Open on mastodon.social

juanejot

@alisca “Since you’re higher beings, with technology indistinguishable from magic, do you mind if we, um… [looks around bashfully, stage-whispers] WORSHIP you?”
“What? Sure, I—“ [Extends sensory stalk toward nearest alien for advice.]
“Great! I’ll just take a bit of…”
“OW!”
“Oh, so that section of your carapace hasn’t calloused yet? Noted…”
They withdraw to their landing craft.
“Tasty. Kinda like lobster. Hey, look at that pretty pattern all across the sky! Why is it so bright it hurts?”

Fin.

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31 Jul 2023 at 7:02 | Open on fosstodon.org

DELETED

@alisca 😂👍

31 Jul 2023 at 7:49 | Open on norden.social

Mia Knox🏳️‍🌈❄️👑

@alisca could you eventually take care of something else, there are some toxic elements that wouldn't welcome you, here is a list of companies and there owners that have enough power to resist your reign.