@jnbhlr well, one of them is that i've got AuDHD type conditions. so it's difficult to do anything that i'm not obsessed with. i discovered that during the 15 years where i attempted to be a part of the regular workforce. but i suspected i wasn't quite normal so i began getting that checked out with psychiatrists and such, and they found anomalies. it's not like you automatically get a get-out-of-jail card just from that, but i was able to prove to the government that i had faced serious issues despite acceptable starting conditions, so it was plausible to the government that "hm, you know, maybe he's having difficulty due to his diagnoses"

the true difficulty is that my productivity is selective. i'm not good with holding onto a job that i dislike.