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Imagine if there were people who kept saying, "I'm not homophobic, but I think gay men should be kept out of locker rooms so they don't assault straight men. And I also think gays and lesbians shouldn't be allowed to marry because that takes away from from straight marriages. Also I think they're converting the youth. Still, I support gays' right to exist." And the mainstream press was like, "SEE? They're not homophobic. They even said so." That's where we are now with trans people. 41 comments | Expand all CWs
@charliejane I remember basically all of those from the 80s, though not all in one person. Maybe less emphasis on locker rooms and more corrupting the youth  There's clearly just a difference of opinion about whether to put all the kittens in a blender. No need to get upset about it. :blobcatupsidedown: @charliejane Trans folks absolutely are getting the brunt of it, but that rhetoric is also being applied to everyone LGBT in my home town right now. Books by gay authors are being labeled inherently pornographic regardless of their content. There's panic about coexisting in the library with gay people. Folks act like the right's problems with LGBT people begin and end with trans folk, but they'll absolutely use it as a springboard to attack everyone who isn't a cis get white guy. @charliejane Not that "they'll come for me too" ought to be a necessary prerequisite for just being a decent person with a conscience. @charliejane I suspect a substantial segment of the GOP base still feels that way about gays and lesbians. @charliejane Attitudes change very slowly. You know, when I used to help organize Trans Lobby Days in Washington, DC, it was my wish that we bring cake and donuts to the congressional offices. Might not change their minds about us, but perhaps we could make them associate us with tasty food. Alas, this excellent social marketing suggestion was met with blank stares.... @charliejane Am I transphobic if I say that I don't really understand trans stuff? I accept that people can do this and I feel that trans people are people who deserve the same rights as everyone else but I don't personally understand it. @gocu54 @charliejane the way i see it: it's okay to be okay with stuff you don't understand. it's not okay to be not okay with stuff just because you don't understand @gocu54 @charliejane in other words, you shouldn't have to understand what trans folk go through to be okay with them having the same rights as anybody else. they're called human rights (not cis hetero rights) for a reason, after all @gocu54 @charliejane maybe not. Something related to consider is that understanding doesn’t have to come before allyship. Just believe trans people who describe their experience and fight for the rights that end up benefiting us all. Trans freedom leads to freedom for everyone—better healthcare, community, etc. @peterbutler @charliejane It's more about the desire for wanting to change I don't understand. How does someone make the decision? How does someone knowingly go through surgery to change their gender?  @gocu54 @charliejane Thanks for replying. I think I understand a little better. First-person accounts from transpeople can help, but I agree it’s hard to know what it feels like or how transition happens. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/my-life-as-a-transgender-woman My2c: as long as you’re not insulting trans people, discriminating against them, mocking them, excluding them, or treating them as otherwise inferior, you’re probably doing OK @peterbutler @gocu54 @charliejane at the risk of speaking for others, i feel like the words "choose" might be a poor word here. it might give credit to arguments that trans friends' gender identity isn't as real (or some other weird terf shit) in general, i think it's probably best to let trans folk describe their experiences for themselves @gocu54 of course not as long as you don't discriminate in action or word Luckily this is the internet where there are tons of places to learn. Here's a site to get started https://www.digitaltransgenderarchive.net/learn/guide but there are lots more! @gocu54 @charliejane I don't think it's ever wrong to accept that you don't understand something. It's also okay to ask others if you want or need help understanding, and that applies to anything. As long as you're making an effort to treat people with kindness and decency, I don't see any problems. @gocu54 @charliejane I should clarify that I am cis-male (far from straight though), and not trans. I'd like to hope that most of the LGBTQ+ community would agree with my comment. It's one of my firmest beliefs that as long as your treating people respectfully, that asking questions when you encounter something you don't understand is perfectly human and nothing to be ashamed of. @gocu54 @charliejane @gocu54 @charliejane boiled down even more, the problem is the word “do”. being trans isn’t something we are “doing” it’s what we are. @gocu54 @charliejane It's fine to say you don't understand something that you haven't experienced, as a trans person myself I think it's awesome you haven't experienced the feeling! It's only bad if you ban trans care because of that fact. But, decades of being uncomfortable with your entire body really messes with the head. After so long of seeing a stranger in the mirror, we find a way to finally become ourselves, and the treatment to change our bodies to fit who we are just makes sense. @PinkfoxFlorian @charliejane I don't feel that banning trans treatment is a good idea. It's not the way to go. We are, afterall, entitled to our free agency as human beings. This includes the ability to change genders, knowing fully that it is not a small decision in the slightest. though I am comfortable being a man, I recognize that some people in this world do want to be their true selves and we as a human race should recognize that fact and accept it. @charliejane It's all recycled bullshit hatred.  I don't know. For some reason that description of not homophobia reminded me of this German public broadcasting company's humor clip about a Nazi arguing about how he's not a Nazi. "Playing the Nazi card in the Third Reich."  @charliejane I mean they used to do that just that in the mainstream until about a decade ago. There's a reason us older queer folks keep calling transphobia "reheated homophobia" :,). Even degendering lesbians used to be super common because people would claim biological truths to sexual orientations and thus cis lesbians were somehow "less" woman than cishet ones and therefore a threat to them in lockers and washrooms. @charliejane There are still people saying that about gay marriage to this very day, you only have to look at the debate going on in the c of e.  @charliejane there absolutely was this in the 80s and 90s in the UK. Calls for segregated bathrooms for gay men, the whole lot. Haters got to have someone to other. It’s bullying of the worst kind. @charliejane why would any researcher give #msm credit for anything but butt fucking #rupertmurdock? @charliejane I want to get my gender removed from my birth certificate, go down to North Carolina, and walk around a mall and ask which bathroom I have to use. I had a chat with someone about gun control and he said “well criminals break the law so why do we need to more laws restricting firearms? After all they won’t be followed” I then asked him “why have laws restricting bathroom access? After all sexual predators will ignore the law?” People are just too dumb  @charliejane the joke is that this is also happening with gay people in the exact way you describe
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@charliejane it has always been like this. it's the same people who say "i'm not racist but keep Black people out of my neighbourhood".