now this is useful. i definitely want to unfollow anyone who boosts my posts & these buttons are large enough that any stab in the general direction of their position will do. convenient!

if only there was a netflix show that would tell me communism is bad

every time my huawei phone has an update i say 'thank you mr president xi for bringing me this update with new features and improved security' when i press install. then i salute the chinese flag until the install has finished

i love it when a fictional characters reportedly reprehensible actions are glossed over as 'dark experiments'. like what were the experiments? did they put a fork into a microwave? try to fuck an apple pie? tell us

what that eye of sauron do 👁️

monty hall: *punches me* what is behind the third door
me: fuck you ass hole
monty hall: *throws a chair at a wall* how can switching a door improve your chances
me: got o hell

being administered a rorschach test. 'that's a wife guy playing 4k while his wife's being emailed'. 'that's a boomer having a heart attack over not being allowed to say the n word'. 'that's italian elon musk'. 'oh my god. can i take a picture of that one real quick? i need to post it'. behind the desk, the psychiatrist prepares a gun