@robotmonkeys I think instance-picking doesn't matter until it does.

You've had no problem with the instance you chose (and TBH, Hachyderm looks like a solid choice!), I've had no problem with mine, either, but I've heard stories of plenty of other people who ended up with awkward mods, or on the wrong end of defed drama or whatever. Smaller instances miss more messages, etc.

In short, I'd be wary of saying "instance choice doesn't matter" in general, just because it didn't matter for you! :)