What you can consider as a big mistake by Meta in all of this situation is this crap with NDA-signers meeting. You cannot properly join network based on open technologiea and transparency using both closed source software and doing dubious meetings behind the closed doors.

Also, please give benefit of the doubt to admins known to attend the meeting with facebook, they are not "evil" and I am sure they wanted to relay proper first hand information about fediverse to Facebook, even if they got carried away by "stakeholders" crap and probably did not relay smaller instances would, but is not necessarily just their fault, but Facebook's for only wanting to talk to big names thinking stuff works here like in "proper" billionare driven networks they are used to.