"I can't believe its not butter, but the name gets more and more sinister as time goes on."

"Its probably butter"
"Some places consider this butter"
"Legally, its butter"
"Ants won't eat this butter"
"Butter that has been known to contain cancer-causing agents"
"the butter is not an object of remembrance or value, but rather a warning sign to future civilizations about dangerous synthetic butter material contained within"