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jwz

Before they will let me publish a new release of XScreenSaver on the "Play" [sic] store, Google, the most rapacious privacy violator ever, insists that a screensaver have a privacy policy.

This is where you come in!

I'd like this policy to be a series of bullet points: "Unlike Google, XScreenSaver will not [Thing.] An endless, concise catalog of their sins.

I need both your snark AND a link supporting your snark. It's critical for the joke to land. Include both.

GO!!

jwz.org/b/ykUc

48 comments
Jalil

@jwz Unlike Google, we will not use your information to fund wars.

jwz

@teivel Need the link. The link on every bullet point is important for the comedy to land. This is science.

Bragg

@jwz unlike Google we won’t be evil with your data.

Emma

@jwz Unlike Google, we will not use your data to train a generative AI model that's also trained on CSAM.

futurism.com/database-google-a

b3n

@jwz Unlike a google product XScreensaver will not be killed by Google killedbygoogle.com/

jgeorge

@b3n @jwz I dunno, with a snarky enough privacy policy, it *could* be killed by Google at least on Android.

small, primitive, wingless
@b3n @jwz nightmare mode: make *each* of these a line item, with a final link to the main page following a disclaimer that the foregoing were just the ones that were known as of the date of writing
Massimo :commodore: :amiga:

@jwz Unlike Google, performance depends on the hardware that runs things, rather than on the government that run things. wired.com/story/tool-shows-goo

Never Getting a Sabbatical

@jwz Unlike Google, XScreenSaver will not use its products to collaborate in surveillance of a state's own citizens.

theguardian.com/news/2018/dec/

noodlejetski :verified_gay:

@jwz unlike Google, XScreenSaver won't deny you access to your entire digital life and report you to police for taking and sending a doctor a picture of your child's medical condition nytimes.com/2022/08/21/technol

Delta Lead

@jwz
Unlike Google, xscreensaver will not send you misinformation on terminating a pregnancy pluralistic.net/2023/06/15/pai (+typoedit)

John Burns

@hybridhavoc @jwz

The people that read privacy policies.

🀣

hybrid havoc

@cholling @jwz The OP does, when he says "I need both your snark AND a link supporting your snark. It's critical for the joke to land. Include both."

DELETED

@jwz Switching to gtk+ 3 is a sin in itself.

thegreekgeek

@jwz
Bit of low hanging fruit but I figured why not lol:
Unlike google, xscreensaver will never tell you to put gasoline on noodles or glue on pizza, because it cannot speak. In the event that XScreenSaver does talk we urge you to ignore it's advice. Much like we do with google.
theverge.com/2024/5/23/2416289

Edward Cant

@jwz I made deletegoogle.com a while back, there are a few useful links at the bottom.

Was thinking I could probably add a few more, so will steal some of these suggestions, thanks! :)

Don Marti

@jwz

Unlike Google, XScreenSaver will not combine or correlate site topics from your web browsing history to infer sensitive information such as race, sexual orientation, and religion.

privacysandbox.com/proposals/t

Don Marti

@jwz unlike Google, XScreenSaver will not collect browsing data from your visits to legitimate sites in order to serve ads on sites on the United States Treasury Office of Foreign Assets Control Specially Designated Nations and Blocked Persons List.

businessinsider.com/google-ser

aerique

@jwz Unlike Google, XScreenSaver will not be made less functional so you can be shown more ads and make you install malware.

arstechnica.com/gadgets/2023/1

(As a non-native speaker my phrasing can use some work.)

AJ Ashton

@jwz unlike Google, XScreenSaver will not buy banking data to connect your in-store transactions to your online advertising profile gizmodo.com/google-reportedly-

:solidarity: egalitaire

@jwz

Unlike Google, XScreenSaver will not run Rogue Online Pharma Ads for prescription only addictive chems and later pay a $500 million fine for this criminality!

wired.com/2011/05/google-rogue

bonus: magazine.atavist.com/the-maste

SteveHeist

@jwz Unlike Google, we won't kill you in a couple years! :D

killedbygoogle.com/

Daniel Marks

@jwz Just cut and paste Google's and change the name in it, and when they refuse it, you can point out they refused their own privacy policy.

johnaldis

@profdc9 @jwz And then β€œUnlike Google’s apps, this app has a privacy policy which is permitted on the Google Play Store.”?

Panda | νŒλ‹€

@jwz @mcdutchie Unlike Google we won’t partner with a hate speech organisation to sequence DNA of kids for a eugenic programme.

abcnews.go.com/Health/mssng-pr

Adam Hawkes

@jwz Unlike Google, XScrenenSaver will not give users a false sense of security around tracking within a mode designated for more anonymity. wired.com/story/chrome-incogni

Future Sprog, XP

XScreensaver will not broadcast your location to your friends, unlike Google Latitude

wired.com/2009/02/google-latit

@jwz

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