Ewww… Total cringe.

When the standard NSF AUP began to fade from websites and the MOTDs across the Internet just better the time people where first able to order pizza online, I scripted up a boilerplate to replace it for my own purposes.

I’ve been pretty much been using this boilerplate for almost three decades now. It’s almost perfect, and covers everything:

All are welcome!

Unacceptable behavior (The No-no’s):) Don’t be a Meany!) No doxing, trolling, stalking, harassment, defaming, threats, or unwanted advances of any kind.) No ad hominem (adhere to the principles of civil discourse).) No other behavior we consider inappropriate in a professional setting.) When in doubt, kindly refer to rule # 1.

If you don’t understand the 5 rules above, this may not be a good match for you, and you may wish to consider another service instead.

We are Bofh: There is no appeal process, the rules are enforced arbitrarily, and we kick/ban without prior notice.

This is THE warning.

Be excellent (Bill and Ted) to each other, and we all can haz Cheezburgerz! 🍔

Questions. I get a few…

“You don’t specifically disallow illegal activities?”

Nope. Why would we? Illegal is illegal, and that’s illegal. Ignorance of the law is no excuse.

“But what’s about marginalized categories of…?”

Of what? Cinnamon buns? Cherry bon bons? Space invaders from Alpha Centauri living in Topeka Kansas? How about Teapots? Or crickets, centipedes, Mallard ducks, and komodo dragons?

Are you smoking crack? Shut the fuck up, read rule #1, and don’t be a pussy!

“I don’t approve of…”

Good for you. Get the fuck out.

“Are teapots really a msrginalized group?

Yes, and we take that very seriously. Here’s how you can help us protect teapots from harmful abuse:

https://httpstatusdogs.com/418-im-a-teapot

Further reading here: https://http.dev/418

#tallship #ToS #AUP #CoC #teapot

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