also realizing there are some serious issues DMing between instances of only Pixelfed. Just did some experiments between pixelfed.social and piconic.co cause I was curious if threading worked correctly there (it does) and noticed that piconic made no notification that pixelfed.social sent a DM. the only way I got it to show up is to start a new DM from the other side and then the already existing DM appeared.
@liaizon Will look into this!